‘Let Go to Get in Flow’ has been this month’s topic at our Damsels in Success meetings across the country and it has proved to be a very powerful motif. Now Spring is here in the Northern Hemisphere many of us think about decluttering/Spring cleaning and getting rid of physical ‘stuff’ that no longer serves us, but how about all the mental, emotional and spiritual ‘stuff’ that we cling onto even if we have a minimalist home? How do we let go of control?
It can be hard to let go of possessions because they are caught up with our emotions, addictions, beliefs, but we all know how much lighter we feel once we have had a good clear out and tidy up. How many of us then fill the space with more things?
Letting Go of Control
The letting go that we’ve been talking about at Damsels meetings is the letting go of control. Consider for a moment how much time and energy you waste in trying to control other people, situations, time, money, other people’s opinions or beliefs…..the list goes on. And are you successful at this? I very much doubt it!
There are some things that you can truly control or influence, but they are all internal to you: your health and wellbeing, your thoughts and beliefs, your motivation, your energy and your purpose. Just about anything else is outside your control and you just deplete your resources by trying to be in control.
My wake-up call came when I went from being a single professional woman feeling totally in control of all aspects of my life to being a married mother of a newborn seemingly in control of nothing. It was very uncomfortable, mainly because I wasn’t used to asking for or receiving help from anyone with anything. It is clear to me now that I had cut myself off from everyone who wanted to help. This was because I felt as a modern woman I should be doing it all in order to have it all.
Many other women of my generation can relate to that. I now realise that our lives work better when we work in connection with others. As much as we want to help others, they want to help us too.
What could you let go of trying to control today? You can start small until you get used to the feeling, anything worth doing is usually uncomfortable. Let me know if there is anything I can help you with.